One Hundred Percent Mallu....

                          "Is this Tamil or Malayalam"?? I asked the man next to me.He turned to me and immediately I knew the answer.The man grinned and said "Malayalam".I had already guessed as I could see that as he replied,it was as if his moustache was talking and his mouth was non-existent.And before you think that I'm going to elaborate on South Indian styles of moustaches and close this window,please refrain from doing so.
                          I should have guessed already as there were giant moustaches walking all around me in the auditorium.If it wasn't that,it was fair complexioned ladies.The latter part in case you were wondering would have ruled out "Tamil" as the man's answer since you know the colour Tamil people and especially women come in.Now,the man said "Aren't you Malayali?".I didn't know how to respond.I hesitantly said "No Sir,I'm Telugu."."Oh",he said,"surprising"."Really"? I thought and gave him a quizzical look.Wasn't I in Hyderabad,the capital of Andhra Pradesh(atleast for now)??He elaborated,"this is the Malayali community over here."I returned the smile,with less moustache though.
                          To finally stop beating around the bush/mush,I was at a Christmas Carols "extravaganza" at a place in Hyderabad.This was my first Christmas away from home and I felt I was missing out on the festivity,so to say.My cousin came to the rescue and suggested a few churches and functions that could probably fill the gap.One such suggestion was this particular function and after the above mentioned conversation,I felt that probably I was not very welcome over there.However,the man engaged me in a nice conversation with his thick English and I was at ease.
                          The singing was fabulous.It was simply great.I couldn't understand most of what they were singing except for "Yeshu","Christmas" and "Merry",but the tenors,sopranos etc. more than made up for it.I had heard about Keralite singing before and now I was enjoying it live,swaying and tapping my feet as the guys and girls opened and closed their mouths in unison and as the organist's fingers made merry with the keys.
                          For me,surprisingly,the most spectacular aspect of the whole evening was more visual than vocal.The reason being,though the sounds entering my ears were as sweet as honey,the sights(read girls) my eyes were feasting on were simply angelic.God's Own Country was written all over them.They were examples of God's partiality towards the female clan of this tiny state from South India.Gawd,were they good looking!!It was like I was opening Santa's presents as each church's name was called and the choir came on to the stage.I must have fell in love with atleast twenty girls who were singing on the stage.Each church had a choir of its own and each choir had angels of its own.They came in different coloured sari's and boy,it was a visual feast.
                          Sunday evenings were seldom as entertaining as that particular one.Suddenly,there was cheer all around and especially inside me.I went home with the tunes in my heart and the faces in my mind.Meanwhile I had made up my mind to find myself a Malayali bride.

My tryst with baked food...

                 I'm slightly on the heavier side.My closer friends will go as far as to say I'm "obese".I live with it.And,more importantly,I don't make any effort to get into so-called "shape".God intended man to be in different shapes and sizes.So,I consider myself to be in one of those shapes.
                 Well...I know I might have "health problems" later on...but again I don't plan on abstainment when I can enjoy all the delights this life has to offer.There MIGHT be chemical reactions going on in the recedes of my tummy whose products MIGHT years later bring me to the fringes of hospital care.As far as it concerns me,there are too many 'MIGHTS' to consume my attention at this age now.
                 I think it began with a small bakery near my home aeon's back when I was barely ten years old.I was not a chocolate freak nor was a "sweet" guy.In fact I was not even heavy those days.But,things were to change for the heavier.I chanced upon this bakery when the usual grocery shop was closed and Mom back home needed bread.So,I bought the bread and Mom complimented me on my choice of a new brand of bread.It was not really a "brand" as such since this bakery in question was too small to even think of branding their products.It was more of a shop and the guy used to sit at a chair.In front of him were different glass containers,the ones which are seen even today in some bakeries.It was at a height and only adults could talk to the guy.I had to stand on a small ledge and only then could I feast my eyes on the products on sale.Thus began my tryst with this bathroom-sized shop otherwise known as "Classic Bakery".
                 More visits to the bakery,more consumption of bread at home and finally I was friends with the son of the owner of CB.He was a guy in his early twenties and used to kid me around.Also,he had the most distasteful sense of humour.He had something to say about every girl who passed by CB.But,I was not to be put off by leering bakery sellers when their products were heaven-like.I had been surveying the various products for a long time now..but hadn't gone ahead to buy any yet.When I did buy the first biscuit..a white one,very small but considerably thick and some flakes associated with it.
                 It was ecstasy.Sheer bites of ecstasy if it were to come in biscuit form.And from that day on,I learnt to smile at his jokes half the time not understanding what they meant and munching on ecstasy.Soon I was familiarized with the brothers and sisters of ecstasy.For need of better vocabulary,I can term them as 'Ecstasy Familia'.Soon the entire bakery was under my purview.My entire pocket money was being spent on CB.I was no longer smoking/sucking on Phantom Cigarettes.They were a thing of the past now.I had to be faithful to CB.Biscuits with small bits of cashew(which were slightly costlier but every bit worth it of course),almost five varieties of white biscuits alone,buns both with and without cream(each had their own charm),cone shaped baked stuff(still not sure what its made of) and last but not the least cup cakes.Cup cakes were miniature doors to heaven.You peel the paper off and you're in paradise.
                By and by,I was seen more at the bakery than anywhere else.The sorcery of CB was a period of around 2-3 years I guess and then I moved on.I mean literally.We moved house.Miles away almost to the other end of town and I had to bid farewell to Classic Bakery.I bought all the biscuits I could buy when we moved and ate them..small portions a day faithfully until like every other good thing,the ration ended.
                 But then,God was kind.Soon I was introduced to the Far East.Long threads of cooked delight.Otherwise known as "noodles".But for that,it demands a separate re-telling altogether.

The Feet Laid To Rest


                  














                                        There will be a lot of cliched words used in this small post. That is a given when attempting to write a paragraph about someone like this person.
                  The crotch-grabbing sequence...the jeweled glove..the indomitable hat...all the glitter...and above all the walk of the millennium.MJ was probably the guy who put the best use of legs in the '80's and '90's.This man owned the stage when he was on one. The greatest entertainer by far in my generation.
                  This is something I read on a website today.Some guy called Jarvis Cocker who was the lead singer of some band called Pulp stormed onto the stage when MJ was performing in London in protest at "the way Michael Jackson sees himself as some kind of Christ-like figure with the power of healing".Well,I'm no popular culture expert,but I can for sure say he must have touched millions of lives around the globe with his music.If his music and his shows could bring so many together in one and enthrall them,wouldn't that be a miracle in itself?In nondescript places all over the world today,people would be mourning the passing away of a highly influential personality.
                   Has it sunk in yet?I have grown up listening to and watching this phenomenon do "miraculous" things on stage.The music videos....they revolutionised the relation television had with music.They say the world tours from '87 till '89 were the pinnacle of entertainment in a long long time.There have been countless celebrities who have tried in vain to bring together at least a wee bit of the charisma he possessed.And not to speak of his charity work.The first "celeb" was also the first celebrity philanthropist.'USA For Africa-We Are The World' alone raised close to $50m for children in Africa.I'm proud to say I sang this song in a choir celebrating National Integration Day years ago in school.
                   True,he has had his rather unhealthy share of controversies.I prefer not to go into them.For me,he is the ultimate performer.A feast for the eyes and the ears..and if you've got better legs than mine..for the legs too.A generation has been left stranded now.Pop culture will never be the same again.And as one of my friends was saying today...maybe cloning is not a bad idea after all.
                   The picture tells it all.At Times Square...the silhouette on a billboard of the King of Pop....Michael Jackson.
                   A small tribute from an insignificant yet fiercely loyal fan of MJ.